Melbourne Days 2 & 3

I used to wonder why the weather was a common conversation topic, but having experienced the vagaries of the weather here in Melbourne, I can understand how it can provide much fodder for discussion even among strangers. In the book I am reading now ('Making the Most of Midlife') there is a quote from Jung on midlife - "We cannot live the afternoon of life according to life's morning; for what in the morning was true will at evening have become a lie." I can't help thinking this describes Melbourne's weather perfectly :)

Yesterday and today were far better than my first day here - largely because the sun came out! Today I actually didn't put on my jacket the whole day until around 4pm when I began to feel a chill. Unfortunately the weather forecasts warn me that this is going to last only one more day so I shall enjoy it while it lasts. 

On Sunday I went with R to the Arkhouse which is the home church where she worships. I liked the homely feel of the church and the sermon was thoughtful. I liked how the group was small enough for people to ask questions to clarify their understanding of the sermon. R played the keyboard and the worship songs were familiar. I was uncomfortable, though, with the way communion was administered and I missed the comforting voice of Joshua / Rennis pronouncing the absolution and benediction. R and I decided our spirituality was tied to our personality - I just like structure :)

After church my dear friends G and P picked us up and we went to a Greek tavern for lunch. I've known their children since they were babies and it seemed unreal to see them as strapping 19 and 17 year olds. Yet they are still the same sweet kids, willing to hug and tolerate being hugged. I hope to spend more time with them the next weekend.  As usual G ordered far too much food and R & I ended up packing our leftovers. 

The restaurant was hosting two big parties and I think there was a lot of food ordered because the waiter gave us free food - free vegetables, a free Greek salad and free baklava for dessert! Both parties were of old people. The party just behind our table seemed to be celebrating the birthday of a lady and at the end she stood up to make  a speech. She held up a hand-drawn diagram of a concentric circle and spoke of how that represented our life's journey. She said we began our life on the outer most ring and along the winding ring were all life's experiences - school, friends, marriage, childbirth, illnesses - and as we age we travel more and more inward towards our self. In the end, she said we move towards being just our Self, moving past all life experiences, and we will have only our Self at the end. The reaction to this at her table was mixed - one old gentleman shouted "You are a pessimist!" :) My table was busy making fun of me for being intrigued by her circle and predicting how I was going to plagirise the digram and make a speech at my 80th and pretend it was an original idea.

Today, I met up with N. I love our friendship. I don't think we have talked in a  year, yet we could talk easily, the years fell away and it was as if we were back in uni. Our life experiences are so very different, but there is comfort in talking to N. The best bit about her is she gives me permission to be me. And I as I type this, I realise that is an endearing part of G as well - he lets me be me, much as he disagrees with my choices, beliefs, even values. These are good friends and I am glad I made this visit.

This holiday is supposed to be about me finding my voice. About me making a decision and more importantly knowing why I made the decision. I have tried consciously not to do what I usually do like make lists, plan what I was going to do each day. I am trying to take each day as it comes. I am focusing on having honest conversations; on doing things I like doing, even if it is doing nothing. What I keep hearing is Benny's words - "please yourself."